neraulia (neraulia) wrote in meta_reznor,
neraulia
neraulia
meta_reznor

day 50, halo 8, track 7

"The Becoming" is my most-played song on Last.fm. It has a cool time signature, switching from 6/8 and 13/8 and back, giving it the feeling of a ballad that's off-kilter, switching from man to machine and back. Too damaged to relate on a human level, the narrator is in the process of withdrawing into a mechanical shell, attempting to avoid further pain. He is afraid of being hurt again, but also afraid of what he is turning into.

Here's what I hear in the last lines:

"I can see it killing away all my bad parts" || Numbing himself to cover false guilt from past abuse.
"I don't want to listen but it's all too clear" || The emotional pain keeps recurring.
"Hiding backwards inside of me I feel so unafraid" || In a womblike, protected space.
"Annie, hold a little tighter I might just slip away" || Embraced by an empathetic and nurturing woman, but with a lingering threat overshadowing that comfort.

"It won't give up it wants me dead / Goddamn this noise inside my head" || Depression and recurrent suicidal ideation.

Pittsburgh 1995
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